Funk-N-Fiction

Ever wish you could ask characters of a story some questions? Find out the HOWs, WHATs, and WHYs that inspire and motivate them? Well, thanks to Lucienne Diver… we have that chance with Hostill from THE SHADOW GIRLS.

Interview with The Boy Who Would be King

The boy I’m introduced to as the one from the posters plastered all over town, is undersized. Or perhaps not. It’s difficult to tell, as his age might be anywhere from ten to twelve to even beyond. What can be said for certain is that he sits in the tavern, back to the wall, as tense as a drawn bowstring. His eyes are as sharp as his apparent hunger, even to the point of tearing apart the heel of bread to sop up every last bit of the fish stew I ordered him. He hasn’t bothered to remove his threadbare cloak or even his hood, ready to take off at a moment’s notice at the sight of a watchman. Or, worse, a sweep by the crown soldiers.

It’s rumored that… ah well, people might lose their heads for putting pen to paper on the swirling rumors regarding the V’Alvan princess with aspirations of becoming queen, but I’m certain you’ve heard them. And that you, faithful readers, have many questions. An old acquaintance whose intel has always been most valuable was able to arrange my meeting with Hostill, also known as The Boy Who Would be King.

You have questions? He had answers.

First off, Hostill, that’s an unusual name.

Not giving away my real name, even if I could remember t’last time anyone used it. But Grammy called me Hostill. Always said I was such a squiggler she had to tell me to ‘hold still’ so often it took.

Are you not afraid you’ll be recognized by your likenesses all about the city? It seems that claimants to the Jucari throne don’t tend to live long.

Well, see, I’m not the one claiming it. My sister – well, I thought she was my sister, but as it turns out…anyway, that’s not important. What’s important is she worked up at the palace serving them royals until she disappeared. Turns out I look so much like the younger one – that’d be Prince Jannik, who declared the Blood War after his older brother was poisoned by the Frizenzian princess he married – that people say no one can deny I’m his get.

As for Bloody Bess, I’m betting she knows what happened to my sister. Let her come for me. I have a few questions of my own.

[Reporter’s note: I’m only quoting the boy’s words. Never would I dare call the Princess Bessory V’Alvan anything short of Majesty or Your Highness. All save her soul.]

You’ve gathered quite a cadre of people who believe in you, have you not? Determined to see you on the throne.

I don’t know what a cadre is, but if that’s another word for the magic men who eat up the anima from the land to create their big battlefield constructs, then you heard wrong. I mean, sure we’ve got that ghost guy haunting his wife, but he’s only in it to mess her around, and he’d do anything but work with us.

No, no, cadre, like a group of people.

Oh, sure then. I’ve been part of the Restoration for ages. Yeah, I see the way you’re looking at me. I’m small, but I’m wiry. I can run messages, packages, do other stuff. They been my family ever since mine died out to the Rot.

What about that woman you mentioned? My sources say she’s a murderess, driven mad by her own guilt. Even that you met her in a graveyard?

That’s a dirty lie. All of it. I mean, maybe not the murderess part, but I didn’t meet her in any graveyard. She crashed straight into my home on the run from the Crownsmen, didn’t she? We had to escape up my chimney flue over the churchyard wall and into the graveyard. Bodies were piled so high during the plague it wasn’t even such a far drop down. That’s just where the soldiers found us. Oh, and that healer lady too.

You mean the hexte?

She’s no witch, no matter what the Crown says.

So, your supporters are the Restoration rebels, who’ve always been against the royals’ use of mageri, a murderess, a hexte, and now, I hear, the spymaster who deserted? With such a band of rogues, how do you expect to be taken seriously as a contender to the throne rather than, say, murdered in your sleep?

Hey, what kind of interview is this? I thought you wanted to hear what I had to say, not say your own piece.
The real rogues are that princess of yours. You want rumors? People say she’s a mageri, draining people rather than the land for her powers. You know how many girls have gone missing around her? I don’t even know the number. No one’s ever found the bodies. And this stupid war, sending out us poor folk to die for them royals when for all we know she killed King Cyril herself or his brother did it or he just died of some bad meat…it’s criminal.

So, yeah, I’m Jannik’s kid if it means I might have some say in how things are done. I don’t want to be king. I don’t think any fat cat sitting on too much money and too little sense should be deciding things for everyone else. But we dethrone Bloody Bess and we can find a better way forward. That’s all I want.

That and another ale. You got more questions for me?

Just one, why did your face go all funny all of the sudden?

Oh, spirit-snot. I’ve got to go. Whatever you say, make it good, okay. Let the people know we’re fighting for them, not against. Don’t believe anything else you hear.

—-

You can meet Hostill and the others in THE SHADOW GIRLS and THE WHISPER KIN (coming September 25^th from Falstaff Books)!

I hope you’ve enjoyed this Coastal Magic Convention Featured Author Spotlight post.
Lucienne will be one of the amazing authors we’ll get to hang out with during the 14th annual reader weekend in Daytona Beach, FL, Feb 19-22, 2026.
 For a full list of Featured Authors, info about the weekend, and link to register to attend, visit http://www.CoastalMagicConvention.com. 
And be sure to watch for more Featured Author spotlights coming up here each month!